It’s been hard to find the time, energy, or words to sum up the past two and a half weeks without going into massive amounts of extraneous detail. If I had one word for it, that word would be “strange”. This has been a new experience for me. I’ve never resigned from a post/been laid off before. I’ve never had to fend for myself when there was no real safety net to catch me. That uncertainty has been slightly unnerving, though not nearly as bad as the previous three months with the other owner’s idiocy and ego looming over the business.

I was so sure how this whole mess was going to play out, but life has an incredible way of making you brutally aware that, like Jon Snow, you really know nothing. My fiance got a tattoo when she went to Hong Kong this summer as a tribute to Anthony Bourdain. It’s in Mandarin (I think?) and loosely translates to “I am sure of nothing.” That is life. Just when you think you’ve got it all worked out, it tosses a wrench into your machinery and mutters about how it’s a pity you didn’t see that coming.

By the same token, though, I’ve never felt so free, really. I’ve been working on a massive project at home almost every day since I left my job, and it’s finally at the completion stage, which means I’ll need to get hired soon or find something else to do immediately, because I might die from boredom.

(“But, Explorer, what about the webcomic? Or that novel you started a decade ago?” Shut. Up. Voice. In. My. Head. Nobody asked you anyway!)

Anywho, to get you all caught up, a couple of weeks ago, I arrived for work with a text from my boss saying he would not be returning to the business as long as the other owner was there, since the other owner had called a meeting and voted my boss out as president. Turns out, he was installing his own people, who knew less than nothing about running the business, and hoping to keep the rest of us on to keep the business running. Yeah, I had an enormous laugh about that later, too. After meeting with him and showing the new office staff how to do the bare minimum (taking payments from students so that they could pay my instructors), I submitted my formal resignation. A week later, the business was shuttered. I don’t know what all went down, and I really don’t care. I’ve washed my hands of it, because I had determined that attempting to keep that place running without the two most essential cogs (my two bosses) would be a nightmare, and I didn’t want that fucking headache. The last task I completed for my former bosses was payroll for their final payroll period, and I never walked back into that place after that.

So, I’ve been doing what’s best for me, recharging, applying for other positions, working on my projects, and helping with my folks while my dad recovers from foot surgery. It’s been a good period, all things considered.

Here are my thoughts on this period in my life: 1) OMG I am elated that I will never have to deal with Big Boss or Minivan Moron EVER AGAIN! 2) My boss from the job before this most recent one called me. I did not take the call, and I don’t know if I will be returning it. Yes, it’s a job. It’s money. But that man is an idiot and undervalued me, and I refuse to work for someone like that again. 3) Do you know how confusingly gratifying it is to be told that you are overqualified for a position? 4) Furthermore, do you know how amazingly gratifying it is to have an interview with multiple, strong, stable, growing companies? It’s staggering. I have a #1 company and a fallback, and neither is a step backward for me. 5) Earlier this week, I shot a 99 on the golf course, and I had some good strokes out there, too. I’ve never shot so well in all my life. So, there’s that, too.

I may write more on leaving and moving on from retail later, but for now, I’m going to focus on where I stand currently. To say I feel good is probably the most accurate descriptor that I can find. Because I feel great these days. I’m going to go into the next phase of my life with renewed vigor and determination. I have been given so many tools and experience over the previous nine months. I can do anything for myself, because I make my own destiny. There is nothing forged into the stars for us so much as a path which must be followed, merely destinations you will reach. The path is up to you.

That is what I have learned. I am who I am, and I’m excited for who I will become.

-The Retail Explorer