I need a drink after all this.

So, today’s been weird. Since the weather has been so bad, we’re pretty much grounded here, and as a result, business is slooooooooooooooowwwwwwww. I’ve caught up on a lot of paperwork, though, so there’s your silver lining. But there are a couple of events that really highlight today for me.

First, we had a new strip up today (yay!), which is here if you haven’t read it yet. And when we publish a new strip, it goes up here on the website, on our Facebook page, on Twitter, tumblr, and Instagram, as well as Tapastic (and soon Line WebToon, also). So, we have a wide variety of followers. I wanted to give y’all the option to read and enjoy this comic on the platform you most enjoy.

Well, I got my first odd comment today. It wasn’t anything malicious or vitriolic. Quite the opposite. It will go down in my memory as the oddest comment I have ever received. It was posted to today’s comic on Instagram by some random IG user who has never liked any of my comic posts, nor is he follower of the account.

Now, I really don’t want to spend much time on this at all, since it’s really not worth any of my time anyway, but he told me that I had the driest sense of humor he’d ever seen and that on 95% of my comics he’s read (which I’m sure can’t be all that many) the punchline fails to land. He closes by rating it an 8.5 out of 10 and telling me to keep up the great work.

The fuck? Seriously, what the hell does that mean? Am I wrong to be confused by this? Look, I can tell when I’m dealing with a bot or a troll or someone who genuinely has constructive criticism, but I honestly don’t know what the hell this is. How can my work be “great” in his eyes if the writing never comes together for him? I don’t understand the point of this. Subjectivity is, generally speaking, not constructive; it’s just your opinion. Normally, when you give constructive criticism, you do it by sandwiching areas which need improvement with areas that are already strong. This is just nonsense. Obviously, the jokes don’t work to him, which means the writing fails, which means that, at best, I should receive a 6 out of 10, right? (I’m being generous.) That’s not “great”.

I’m just baffled by it. But that means I’ve lingered far too long on this point, and I need to make one very important one: I make comics for you, but they’re the comics that I want to make. Nothing subjective will change my approach. You see a technical issue? That’s good. I can work with that. You think my jokes aren’t funny? Well, there’s a very simple fix for that: Stop reading this comic, because it’s not going to work for you. Different strokes for different folks.

Second, I had to deal with two students from the old flight school today. One, who I have seen many times over the years, came in with his buddy. Aside from not knowing what area they’re in (go figure), they had no idea how sales returns worked. His friend bought three charts, two IFR and one VFR. Actually, he asked for the “low VFR” chart, which isn’t a thing. Anyone who’s taken flight instruction knows that’s not a thing. So, his friend buys items then leaves.

Ten minutes later, the guy returns with one of his friend’s charts because he got the chart for the wrong area, which is very difficult to do since the effective area is clearly marked on the front cover. He has no receipt. Fine. I know who he is. His friend was the only sale we’ve had today. No biggie. He needs the one for this area, which are out of stock and on order.

“I need the one for this area.”

“I’m sorry but we don’t have it. It’s on backorder.”

“You don’t have it?”

“No. It’s on backorder.”

“So, none?”

Sometimes I thank the maker for little reminders of why the hell I got away from that place. This wasn’t one of those times. Anyway, he now wants a refund. Fine. I’ll make this work.

“Do you have the card?” I ask.

“Card?”

“Yes. The card he used to buy it?”

“No…”

“Then I can’t do the refund.”

“You can’t?”

I don’t have words to explain this. I figured this was pretty much universally known that in order to get a refund, if it’s not in cash or check, you have to have the card you used to buy that item. I guess I was wrong about that. My bad for assuming intelligence again. Yes, it is possible to reverse that transaction, but that creates more problems than it fixes, chiefly the increase in paperwork and the fact that I’d still have to re-run the card, which I don’t have, for the amount of the other items he still kept. So, yeah, unnecessary pain in the ass and equally as impossible as the previous solution.

So, he leaves and returns with his friend so his friend can get a refund. Key in the refund amount, pop the card in, boom, done. Easy. These students are excellent at one thing: Making easy things difficult. It’s not a language barrier. It’s not a cultural barrier. It’s an ignorance barrier. When you’re in this country for any length of time, and you don’t acclimate to certain aspects of daily life (in this case, buying things), that’s a failing on your part. Your willful ignorance leaves you unable to be a functional adult. That’s not only idiotic, but it’s also incredibly dangerous.

That and I refuse to hand-hold an adult, who wants to be an airline pilot, through the process of buying something from a store. Am I wrong?

-The Retail Explorer